TV ho to BIG ho

Husband had been threatening to buy a 32 inch LCD TV for a while now. When I say threatening, what I really mean is he has been sulking and demanding that I say its alright to do so. Now I haven’t really ever told him not to buy it but because he is a man with a mind of his own and all that and far be it from me to behave like a modern day version of Lalitaji.

Its just that he knows that I always saw the expense as akin to buying a fur mink coat in a city like Mumbai. He was also painfully aware that if he did buy it, he would never hear the end of it. the wasteful expenditure of it all etc, etc. By the time Diwali happenned, he decided that enough was enough and that I was indulgent enough to look the other way if he did make the big purchase.  And he did. And when I saw it, i finally understood what the fuss was all about. Size does matter as cliched as that sounds and bigger definitely equals better.  My 21 inch Onida flatscreen has been collecting dust in the bedroom from the day the new LCD came into our lives.

But a 32 inch screen can be a demanding indulgence. Now, Husband has firmly told me that ordinary cable just doesnt cut it, only state of the art DTH will do for this new baby. Alongwith that, he also wants to buy a state of the art (his words, not mine) DVD player.

Whats wrong with the present DVD player that we have?  Dont ask me, ask him.  

So he called Airtel, Reliance and Tata Sky, in an attempt to figure out which one he wants to take. He narrowed it down to Airtel and Reliance. His choice? BIG TV. Although Airtel was his first choice.

Airtel, for all the money it has spent on the new ad campaign, star endorsements etc, obviously forgot to bother about this little thing they call customer service/interface. Their website looks like it has been created in a hurry, very tacky presentation compared to the amount of time devoted to their TVC.

Their customer care guy gave us the location of the shop that stocked airtel’s DTH package but refused to give us the number of the shop so we could call them up ourselves and locate the shop. Was the guy mad?

“i NEED THE NUMBER,” I tell the dork on the other end.

“Sorry madam, we can’t provide you with that:”

I am truly amazed. Is this for real?

Ten minutes later, I realise it is.  I hang up and drive across to the nearest Reliance World outlet and buy myself a year’s worth of recharge coupons and a starter package.

Is it worth the money?

Dunno, they haven’t installed it yet. Reliance’s customer care guys say they will take anytime in the next 7 working days to come and fix it.

I give up. Truly.

Madam, please tell, are you in the media?

I got a call from Airtel’s efficient backend staff the other day who chirpily informed me that they were calling from ‘Airtel-IMRB’ and could I please spare some time to answer the questions for a survey on consumer satisfaction. I had just paid a huge phone bill due to an overseas trip and was quite put out by their service. I had gone to Paris on work and because my credit limit was crossed, Airtel cut my line, both incoming and outgoing. I was stuck in a foreign country with no phone and no means of contacting anybody if something happened. The fact that there was a fire in my hotel the morning that I was leaving only fuelled my sense of injustice. Paris is probably the most unfriendly city in the world and to be stuck there without a phone and no french skills can be an experience from hell. It probably wasnt unfair that they cut my outgoing, it was unfair however that they cut my incoming as well, in a bid to force me to pay the amount as soon as posiible. My friend, who was on BPL and travelling with me, didnt have outgoing too but her mobile phone company did have the courtesy to provide her with incoming. Thats the background.  Back to present moment. Aunty on the other line is going on and on and on about not wanting to disturb me etc, etc.  

My reaction usually is to decline any such cheerful overtures from my phone company but this time my angst ridden state of mind said, ‘Bring it on, let me have a go, this time someone would get an earful about what I think about their service…’

Just as i was preparing to let out the angst and tell them exactly how shitty their service was, Aunty abruptly asked me as an afterthought,

“Madam, only tell me, you are not in advertising or media industry…”

My attention was piqued. “And why does that concern you, may I ask?,” I queried.

“Then you cannot be a part of the survey, madam.”

“Why is that? I am in the media and I want you to ask me questions about my Airtel experience.”

“No, Madam, sorry, thank you for your time, it is our….”

I am getting desperate to give her at least one pearl of consumer angst ridden wisdom… ”But you must ask me questions, at least one question…Its only fair.”

“No madam, our policy says no media and advertising people to be involved…”

“But I am human too and I am feeling marginalised…I demand…”

 ”Good Day Madam.”

Rude! She called me, right?

I am guessing three months from now I will get a press release in my inbox saying Airtel conducts largest ever consumer study with sample size of 203,450 Airtel subscribers across the country. Key Findings: 98% consumers are very happy with their service. 99% would buy another Airtel connection. 98.4% will never change their mobile service operator. 87% said they would get the Airtel logo tattoed on their ass.  Basically, all in the rubbish zone.

Point is, why don’t they want my point of view?